The lyrics call her a wild flower. Not because she’s reckless, but because she’s resilient. She didn’t grow in a garden. She grew in the wild. In chaos. In grief. In silence. And yet, she still became something beautiful.

I had a moment where I said no. A firm, honest no. And immediately, I felt that gut-level fear rush in. My body tensed up like something bad was going to happen just because I chose myself. That’s when it hit me I have a history of feeling unsafe when I try to protect myself. Especially with family. Especially with people I care about.

One thing I’ve been hearing a lot lately is people saying, “Being nice got me nowhere,” or “Being a loving person only got me hurt.” And listen, I get it. That kind of pain cuts deep. But let’s be real. Being nice isn’t what got you hurt. What got you hurt was your lack of boundaries.

Because for so long, “yes” was survival. “Yes” kept the peace. “Yes” made other people comfortable. “Yes” gave me a role to play: helper, strong friend, dependable daughter, the one who always comes through. But now I’m learning that every “yes” I didn’t mean was a little betrayal of myself.